What if they saw you sweat?

A recent blog post by writer Donald Miller, What if the Temptation to Be Impressive Keeps Us From Connecting? got me thinking. Mr. Miller, author of the Storyline Blog, writes about how he is bored by people who portray themselves as perfect. I believe there's an important lesson here for people with hyperhidrosis and social anxiety. Often when we're so busy trying to hide our sweat, we are unable to connect with others. We may also lose the ability to discern who is a true friend who is worthy of your time and love. (And when I say "worthy," I'm talking about someone's integrity, morals, and originality--not their social standing or wealth.)

In high school, I lived in fear of classmates discovering my hyperhidrosis. I avoided activities where I might need to hold or shake others' hands. At religious services, I would leave for the bathroom in the middle of each service to avoid exchanging the sign of peace. When I won an award for excellence in my sport (surprise, surprise...it was swimming!), I refused to attend the ceremony to accept the trophy because I would need to shake hands. All of this kept me apart from others, alone in a crowd. And it was all because I was afraid I would be made fun of because of my sweat.

My fear of being teased was valid--I had been teased because of my sweat--but I was not able to think this through at the time. If someone is making fun of me because of my sweat, what does it say about them? Now I know that mean people are often hurting on the inside. Ostracizing others is a way to boost yourself at others' expense. Ultimately, the cruelty hurts all involved. People who are at peace with themselves naturally feel compassionate towards others. They are the people you want to know. They are the people who are capable of healthy friendships. They are the people who will accept you for who you are, even if you sweat like a football player eating jalapeno peppers in a sweat lodge. When I think about my high school classmates, I believe there were some who would have been excellent friends who I did not connect with because I was too busy hiding.

Therefore, being honest about your hyperhidrosis will weed out people who lack the compassion and self-love to be a true friend. I'm not saying that you need to tell everyone all the time. But there are some times and places where it's better to be honest. If someone rejects you, yes, of course, it will hurt. But ultimately, the loss is theirs.

Love,
Tiara

Slippery grace: Yoga is for people with hyperhidrosis too

Hi everyone, It's been a busy summer so far. I hope everyone is enjoying these long days. I wanted to call your attention to an interesting post, Yoga and Hyperhidrosis, written by the author of hyperhidrosis blog My Life as a Puddle.

I have avoided attending a yoga class for a very long time because of my hyperhidrosis (HH). I worry about sweating all over the yoga mat and leaving puddles on the floor. I also worry about doing positions like downward dog and sliding out of them since my hands are sweaty and have no traction.  

I can relate. Nevertheless, I fell in love with yoga about 15 years ago, despite my sweaty palms and feet.

Sweaty palm spirituality

It took me about 8 years from the first time I wanted to do yoga (back in the 80s when it wasn't nearly as popular in the U.S.) to the time I started doing it regularly. In my first class, the teacher asked us to work with a partner, taking turns holding each others' feet in a pose.  Just thinking about it now makes my feet sweat! At the end of the class, we all sat in a circle meditating and holding hands. Needless to say, the class was less than relaxing. Because the teacher was an exceptionally kind woman (as well as a therapist with her own practice), I called her afterwards to tell her why I wanted to drop out. As is often the case, her reaction to my disclosure was underwhelming. Without skipping a beat, she said, "It's no problem. We don't have to hold hands while we meditate. I appreciate your sharing your perspective."

That was 15 years ago, and I've been doing yoga ever since. As I type this, I think of this wonderful teacher and smile. I hope she knows she made a difference in someone's life.

Quick yoga tips for people with hyperhidrosis

• Bring a towel to class, and use the towel under your hands during downward dog, plank, and other exercises where you place weight on your hands. No fancy equipment is needed. I find that the thin towels usually found at gyms work the best. 
• Bring socks in case you do partner exercises
• If the teacher seems like a discreet and understanding person, talk to him or her privately about any discomfort you might be having due to your hyperhidrosis
• Use this opportunity to go deep inside yourself, focusing on your breathing and the alignment of your body. You might find that your sweating is reduced by the end of the class. This is almost always the case for me.
• Be kind and gentle to your body and your spirit.

Love,
Tiara